Monday, June 28, 2010

Mad as a cut snake

Hey mates! I just posted some pictures of Byron Bay. Kelly and I went there about a week ago. It was great to see a bunch of hippies, and to be honest, it felt exactly like Boulder. Anyway, I have some more slang for everyone:

Worn out/used - Cactus

Tired - Buggered / Knackered

Diaper - Nappy

Gummy Bear - Jelly Baby

Assume - pronounced "a-shume"

Persuade - pronounced "per-shwade"

Schedule - pronounced "shed-ule"

Basil - pronounced "bazz-il"

Schedule - Diary

Throw a fit - Chuck a wobbly

Speedo - Budgie smugglers / DT's

Monday, June 7, 2010

How you going mate? Got any hundreds and thousands to put on this patty cake?

I just put up a bunch of pictures of Australia and my visit to the US for my sis's graduation. Check them out! And now, more slang:

Food - Tucker

Living room - Good room

Corn dog - Battered sav

Bills (money) - Notes

Math (class) - Maths

Hot dog - Saveloy

Morning tea - Smoke-o

Poets - Piss off early, tomorrow's Saturday

Raining - Pissing off

Alcoholic - Piss head

Middle of nowhere - Woop woop


Monday, May 31, 2010

Twilight mania strikes Oz

The stars of the movie "Twilight" are visiting Sydney right now and it has caused pandemonium throughout the nation. On the main news channel in Brisbane, they were interviewing fans who had seen the celebrities and how they reacted to this rare opportunity. Very, very goofy. And yes, that's pretty much the biggest news headline here. Ok, back to slang...

Corn dog - Dagwood dog

Sunglasses - Sunnies

Jersey - Guernsey

Airplane - Aeroplane

Pickle - Gherkin

To score (a parking spot) - Jag

Rumor - Furphy

Browse - Squizz

Finish your food - Roll it over

Big fair - Ekka

Cute - Shame (in South Africa)

Woman - Sheila

Man - Bloke

Idiot - Drongo

Rice Krispies - Rice Bubbles

Flashlight - Torch

Thursday, May 13, 2010

This side to kerb

Bathroom - Dunny

Chicken - Chook

Disposable wash cloth - Chux

Angry - Spittin' chips / spewin'

Something easy - Too easy Campesi / piece of piss

If you're not happy - Not happy Jan

Sleazy act - Lower than shark s#*$

Suitcase - Port

Cocktail sausage - Little boy / cheerio


Thursday, May 6, 2010

This house is not for sale, but rather $1200 a month to rent

More slang coming at ya:

Kangaroo meat - Skippy

Freshman - Year 1
Sophomore - Year 2...and so on

Middle School - Primary School

High School - Secondary School

Z - pronounced "zed"

Zs are usually Ss when spelling something, like authorized is spelled authorised here.

Duct Tape - Gaffer Tape

H - pronounced with an "sh" sound instead of a "ch"

Cooler - Eskie

Two weeks - Fortnight

Check - Cheque

Friend - Mate / Cobber / Digger

Redneck - Bogan

More Expensive - Dearer

Monday, April 26, 2010

Censorship? What's that? Only in subtitles...

Free, public television in Australia is uncensored, except when bad language is subtitled. As far as I can tell, profanity, nudity, and anything else is completely acceptable when you're flipping through the main channels that show the news and kids' shows and what not. The radio is also uncensored. Something that's a little different. Anyway, got more slang. Learning new ones everyday!

Drug store - Chemist

Mom - Mum

Liquor store - Bottle shop

Candy - Lollies

Scotch tape - Sticky tape

Sharpie - Nico

Counter - Bench

Antique shop - Salvo

College - Uni (or University)

Kindergarten - Kindie

They also have "late night shopping" every Thursday. Typically, most stores close at about 5 everyday, but on Thursdays, stores stay open to as late as 9 or 10 PM. Crazy huh? It's just so tame to the hardcore shopping scene in America.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Have any gaffer tape, mate?

Here I am again to share some more slang I've picked up along the way. I learn/embarrass myself at least once each day with a language I thought I knew pretty well.

Lunch/Dinner - Tea

Color - spelled Colour here

Tire - spelled Tyre

Dress - Frock

Favorite - spelled Favourite

Breakfast - Brekkie

McDonald's - Macca's

Mushroom - Mushie

Running Shoes - Runners or Sand Shoes

Line - Queue

Saturday, April 3, 2010

5 dollar, 5 dollar foot long...7 in Australia

More slang:

Silverware - Cutlery

Windshield - Windscreen

Napkin - Serviette

Shopping Cart - Trolley

Flip Flops - Thongs

Parking Lot/Garage - Car Park

Sidewalk - Footpath

Appetizer - Entree

Entree - Main

Cup of coffee/tea - Cuppa

Also, you don't eat meals here with just a fork. Every meal is always eaten with two utensils. Kelly has adapted very well but I just shovel with one hand.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Hmm what's that on your shirt? Oh, bat poop.

I just uploaded about 40 pics onto flickr so check those out! They are from when Lee (Kelly's brother) visited and from last weekend when Kelly and I went to the Sunshine Coast to work at a triathlon. Good stuff! While I'm here, I have some more slang to share.

Sandwich - Sanger

Meat Pie - Dog's eye

Ketchup - Tomato Sauce

They pronounce shallots "shaw-lots" and inventory "in-ven-tree" and scallops "skull-ups"

I agree - Beauty Nuke

Bathroom - Loo or Ensuite


Thursday, March 25, 2010

Busy as a one-armed bricklayer

Thank you - In Aussie: Ta

You're welcome - No worries

An expression for being busy:  I'm busier than a dog trying to bury a bone in a marble floor.

Another for being busy:  I'm flat out like a lizard drinking.

One more for busy:  I'm flat strap.

If something is easy:  Easy as, mate.

Whine - Winge

Whiner - Winger

English person - Pommie

American - Yankee


Wednesday, March 24, 2010

A real dog's breakfast

Running shoes - In Aussie: Sand shoes

Swimsuit - Togs

Hood (of a car) - Bonnet

Trunk (of a car) - Boot

Slob - Dag

Bill (of a hat) - Peak

Monday, March 22, 2010

Good on ya, mate

After some thinking, I've realized that blog posts about Australia aren't going to be nearly as entertaining or as strange as those from Taiwan so I'm gonna start posting a word every day or two that is different than what I'm used to in American English. We'll give it a shot!

Raisin - In Aussie...Sultana

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Vacation Island

It's been about 6 weeks since I left Taiwan and it's getting harder and harder to believe that I was actually there. I've spent some time looking at photos from there, of ones I'd taken as well as friends' photos. Taiwan looks familiar, but it feels like a distant memory. I will say that I am SO glad that I don't have to eat the food there again. I have had a few funny moments though in Australia related to Taiwan. I had a mother and son come in to the running store I'm working at and they were speaking in Chinese and I understood some of it, so I decided to strike up a conversation in Chinese with them. It went pretty well. I was talking to a guy yesterday who is living and working in Hong Kong, and he said he'd just been in Taiwan a few months ago for New Year's. I said "oh really, how was that?" after completely spacing the fact that I had been there for New Year's.

Anyway, life has been good in Australia. I am unfortunately getting taxed 45% on my paychecks because I failed to obtain a tax file number before I arrived here, mainly because I didn't know I needed one. The running store I'm working at is good, although I know I don't want to work retail that much longer. Living with Kelly has been great, and much better than some people had warned living with someone would be. She's enjoying her job as well, although she's in the same boat as me in thinking that retail will only be of interest for so much longer.

There's a lot of Australian slang here. I'll give you a few examples of slang words and of different pronunciations of words:

asphalt - spoken 'ashfelt'
controversy - 'contrawversy'
88 - 'double 8' (any number is said like this, letters too)
777 - 'triple 7'
debut - 'dayboo'

how are you? - how you going?
stroller - pram
parking cone - witch's hat
trash - rubbish
total - all up

Hmm, I'll have to think of more later. Feeling a bit brain dead right now. I went to a punk show last night with Kelly, where we saw The Flatliners. I had seen them a few years ago in Denver with Jess and I'd met the singer there, where I told him to pick out one of the band's shirts for me to buy. So last night, I went up to him after the show, and told him about the last concert, and he remembered all the details. Even the name of the venue in Denver. He helped me pick out another shirt. He told me he couldn't believe how expensive everything in Australia is.

Other than that, Australia feels basically like home, minus knowing any people. The weather has been great, although we've gotten more rain in Brisbane than they've had in like 6 years or something. The running has been good. Our new apartment is working out really well. We're right across the street from the train station so we can both get to our jobs easily.

I did add about 100 pictures to my flickr page and that will give you a better idea of what has been happening down here in Oz! Check 'em out! Off to a race!

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

I need to wash my bowl. Can you hand me that rag? Yeah, the one with the raw meat sitting on it. Thanks.

This past weekend, I hopped on the ol' high-speed train to meet up with my friend James. We used to work together at the Millennium. It's hard to believe that it actually took me 51 of my 52 weeks here to meet up with him but we made it happen. When I first arrived, we went out to eat. I had curry, which of course had plenty of bones in it. Then he said he had relatives staying in his house so he bought me a hotel room. Nice guy huh? The hotel was alright, but it had a terrible view. See the flickr picture. Anyway, the next day we cruised around town with his friend Norman. We saw a bunch of historic places, and dined at a German restaurant, and saw some fishermen not catch any fish. It was good to get some sun though, and experience more of Taiwan!

Tonight was a going-away party for me hosted by the Chinese teachers at school. We went to KTV, which is their equivalent of karaoke. It was a lot of fun. We played a good mix of English and Chinese songs, meaning one half of the room would be completely bored while the other half sang, and vice versa. They also gave me a giant card with lots of Chinese written on it so that'll be a good keepsake. Other than that, I've got two days of school left and I couldn't be happier and more relieved knowing that it's almost over! It's been a great year but I can't wait to go to Australia. Very exciting! Kelly found a house for us and I have a job interview next week to work at a running store. I'll be keeping my blog running I hope when in Oz although I'm predicting the stuff I do won't be nearly as strange or interesting as what I've experienced here. But, who knows...

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Do you want your chicken with or without the spine?

On Saturday, I headed into Taipei with Josh to seek out Snake Alley. We found it. It was weird. I had read about it in one of my guide books as a recommended place to go. There were only 2 things that I saw that were snake related but they were gross and weird nonetheless. One of the places was a restaurant that I'm assuming you could eat snake at. In the lobby, they had at least 3 huge pythons that were each over 8 feet long. Two of them were in the same cage together that was WAY too small for them. There was a live chicken just hanging out inside, but unfortunately we didn't get to see a gruesome killing. The next stop was the snake charmer/killer a few storefronts down. He had a cobra hanging out in front of him, constantly hissing and striking at him. Then there were 3 dead snakes hanging on ropes that had their bellies slit and their blood was being drained. It was then made available to drink. No one I saw watching was brave enough to try it. He also had a lovely video playing in the background of him skinning a snake alive. Lovely. Earlier in the day, we went to Nut Street, which was basically a farmer's market, but with a lot of nut varieties. They also were selling shark fins everywhere. This was crazy to see, especially considering how much stuff I've seen related to how horrible the killing is. My roommate did make the point though that if we think that shark killing is terrible, then what do Buddhists think of us killing cows? And there's a lot of Buddhists. Oh well, there's a deep thought to ponder for the day.

Today, I hung out with little Brian's family. We started the day with the usual tutoring/playing games in a slippery room in which the kids fall in and cry a lot. Brian was whiny for a good half hour after he fell, which was the first time I'd seen him like this. Then we hopped in the car and headed to Ilan, which is east of Taipei on the coast. We went out to eat at a famous restaurant, known for its chickens, which are cooked in wood-burning cauldrons. After they're cooked, the whole chicken is brought to you on a platter, minus its heartbeat, organs, and feathers. Brian's grandma proceeded to grab its neck and body and then pull the two apart, removing the chicken's head, neck and entire spine in the process. It was gruesome but entertaining because she's pretty elderly. Anyway, the meal was actually pretty good because the chicken was hot, and usually chicken is served cold. During the meal, Brian's mom made the comment, "This is very Taiwanese" and I said in my head, "I know." Ha ha.

Then we drove to downtown Ilan where we put our feet in the public hot springs they have there. This was a lot of fun. Then we walked around an outdoor market where we sampled various fruits and teas. Then we drove to a large park along the main river in Ilan county. This was a nice peaceful place, but the fun was ended abruptly when I ran a race against little Brian and he proceeded to slip and fall on some wet concrete, so he was crying and threw another fit. He was way more mopey than usual today. Later that night, I did have this sort of strange conversation with him telling him I was leaving in two weeks and probably not ever coming back to Taiwan. It was actually kind of sad to have this conversation, and I also couldn't quite tell if he realized the meaning of what I was saying or not, potentially because he didn't actually understand the English. Oh well, he didn't cry then at least so that was a plus.

At night, we went to the Luo-Dong night market which was massive and crazy. I didn't see a single foreigner there, because this place is outside of Ilan and getting deeper into the heart of Taiwan. That's one thing though that's been so cool about hanging out with their family, is that I've been able to go to places like that many times. Lots of stares is all I can say. Ha ha. Anyway, this was probably my last big weekend with little Brian's family and I will definitely miss them when I leave. Hopefully, I'll be able to see them in the future though!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

There's no I in TEOM

So, if you recall from my last blog, I discussed how our floor in the apartment is being fixed. The "detail" work that was promised the other day was this: They filled all of the cracks with some greenish putty and left all of the tape on the broken tiles. Tomorrow, at 9 AM they're supposedly coming to finish the job once and for all. If they finish tomorrow, it'll be a miracle. And even if it is finished, they fixed the white tiles with greenish putty. It's going to look horrible when it's done, but the landlord's parents have been here supervising everything so I guess it's good enough. The walls are still dirty from when the trim was removed. And the whole floor is not nearly as smooth as it used to be. Smooth, that's note the right word. Flat. That's better. Let's just say that where the new tiles join, it's not quite as seamless as it used to be. I think the best way to describe this whole ordeal is with two words: "hack job." More later!

Monday, January 18, 2010

The prospects for the future are very good

On Saturday, I went to the Taipei Hash, perhaps for the last time. I guess this is like the 4th time or so that I've gone to it. It was a lot of fun! One of the hares was a fellow white guy, so about 12 white guys showed up to support him. We went to Pingsi, an area about a half an hour southeast of Taipei. The run wound in and out of many tea fields, along a drainage canal in the jungle, through a farm, and of course, through someone's house. One of the hashers was whooping loudly like a howler monkey the entire run. It was pretty cold and rainy. The weather has definitely come full circle for me. I'm quickly nearing the end of my year, and the weather is making me more eager to leave. Anyway, the run was great. It was about 75 minutes long, and I would guess about 60 hashers were there. It was actually a pretty small turnout for that particular group. Some new names that were pretty funny that I noticed: Sea Turtle, Point, and Two-Head.

Yesterday, I went biking in Taipei with Dan, Lauren, Sam, and Jade. We rode along the Keelung and Danshui river. We were out biking for at least 4 hours. There were a ton of people out biking. The bike path was great and only crossed one road. The thing that was weird was how often the bike path changed its width. Sometimes, it was wide enough for like 10 bikes, while other times, barely 2 bikes could fit. It was definitely not all built at the same time. The highlight came when we got to the far end of our ride and we called the bike rental place because we were curious what time we needed to return the bikes. They said 4:30. We had called them at about 4:15. They grudgingly accepted our offer to return them by 6. After we hung up, the whole group got worked up in a biking frenzy as we tried to race back to return the bikes in time. Relaxed became manic in a matter of minutes. We made it back just in the nick of time, right as the sun was setting. It was pretty stupid that first of all, they didn't tell us what time they were gonna close, but also, that they closed at 4:30 when it didn't get dark until 6. Oh well. Only in Taiwan. Afterwards, we went to a great "western" restaurant in Taipei. It was good. Strangely, both cab drivers we used spoke English really well. We felt pretty bad after riding with one because we were making fun of his taxi that had funny water seat pad things. When we were getting close to our destination, I told him where to go in Chinese and he responded "I know where to go" with perfect pronunciation. I asked him if he had been listening to us, and he said a little.

Anyway, I posted a bunch of pics on-line from the last few weeks. The construction on our apartment was sort of finished today, but about 8 of the tiles are cracked in half and they have red-tape on them, meaning to fix. I'm not sure if they broke because the workers were clumsy, or if they were extremely fragile following the earthquake. Regardless, they're coming back tomorrow to do "detail work," so I'm eager to find out what that means and how they're planning on fixing these shattered tiles after they've fully installed them with grout and everything. Check the pics!

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Wordanista

I had the privilege of heading into Taipei today to get a chest x-ray for my work visa application for Australia. I woke up about an hour later than I wanted to which is typical for me. I got to the hospital about an hour later than I wanted to, so I got there at a pretty busy time. I went to the front desk, where they instructed me to go down a hall and turn right. I followed their directions and ended up at the same place I started. Another woman helped me and got me into a line, where they proceeded to tell me to go to a different place in another building. Finally, I was in the right line. They took a photo of me and then weighed me. Then the x-ray was painless but I also had a get a physical exam which was unexpected. The exam itself took about a minute, but what was funny was waiting to see the doctor. I was in a waiting room with maybe 15 other people, and while we were sitting, a doctor came out and set up shop in front of all of us with big posters and a giant toy cigarette. She was giving a speech about how smoking is bad. She was very into it and speaking very quickly in Chinese of course. She must've thought I understood her because she came over to me at one point during her speech and asked me a question, which I responded to by staring back blankly and saying "wo ting bu dong" meaning I don't understand. She was talking to what initially seemed like an audience just for her, but about 2 minutes into her speech, most of the people left to go see their respective doctors. She kept on talking though, and of course into a microphone that was plugged into a speaker that wasn't turned on. She didn't notice it. No one in the audience said anything about it. And her assistant standing by her also didn't say anything. Hmm, kinda funny.

Tonight, when I got home I expected to find the repairs on our floor complete. Wrong. When I got out of the elevator, there was a pile of tiles sitting there, as well as our couch and dinner table. Inside, our entire apartment living area is bare. The walls are now dirty in a lot of spots and some of the concrete beneath the tiling they ripped up is chipped. So now, what was supposed to take a day or two, could now take weeks. Who knows. I'm ready for whatever, because it's Taiwan and nothing is ever quite what you'd expect! I'll keep everyone posted. I have a feeling it's going to be quite the little saga.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Treat every intersection in Taiwan as a 4 way stop, regardless of what the traffic lights suggest

Well, the thrill of the hash has definitely faded somewhat since my initial experience but this last weekend was still a lot of fun. What was funny was that there were a lot of new people this time. I'm sure this is how it is every year though, as the new teachers and what not arrive for their contracts. I did meet 3 guys who live in Linkou just a few blocks from me. One is from Texas, one from Singapore, and one from Italy. They all spoke perfect English and I'm sure I'll see them again in the future. I did ask the Italian what he thought of the food in Taiwan. I consider Italian food like basically the best in the world, so I thought his opinion of the food would be something along the lines of disgusting, but he actually said he liked it for the most part. Kind of interesting. I also met 2 guys from Australia, and one from Brisbane. They're here studying Chinese for 3 months on a full-ride scholarship. Anyway, the hash was funny but I think my funny feeling was just from the fact that there were so many new people and it felt like a new group I didn't really belong to. I'm planning on going to the Taiwanese hash on Saturday though so that will be a whole different experience altogether. Should be interesting.

As for the run itself on Sunday, it was great! Wildman was the hare, who supposedly does it once a year, and every time, it's not to be missed! He's a Taiwanese guy with flowing, wild hair, aviator shades, and really short shorts. And he drives a big, creepy van. The run was about an hour, winding through rice paddies, people's houses, and went right by what I think was a pig slaughterhouse. Pretty gross. The sounds coming out of there were not pleasant at all!

As for school, things are going well. The final exams for the older kids start on Friday and go through next Monday. Then we have 2 weeks of class with them where we practice more English although they've already taken their final exams. What boggles my mind is the fact that they have their final exams at their main elementary schools this week also, so it made me wonder why they don't move the English exams to next week if we're just going to be playing games anyway? Hmm, there must be a reason. After those two weeks of games, I have one week of games with the younger kids and then I'm done! I am so very excited and counting down the days big time. It's been very cold here and only adding to my excitement about leaving. The temperatures here have been below 10 C but because there is no central heating in buildings here, it's that cold all the time, so as you can imagine, it gets a little old after awhile. Australia is in the 30s right now, but it is their summer.

Oh well. It's getting kind of hard to believe that this year is almost over although it still seems like a long way off and not real yet. I do know I've been here for awhile though, based on the fact that I feel my blogs are becoming less interesting in the sense that day to day life here is no longer as strange as it initially seemed. That's bound to happen anywhere though. I'm eager to start my next journey, though the culture shock in Australia won't be nearly as jarring. Jarring, I think that's a word.

Today, we had the floor repaired in our apartment. I think I had mentioned previously in a blog that we had had an earthquake here a few weeks back and it messed up the tile flooring in our apartment. Anyway, I got home tonight expecting a nice new floor, but instead what I got was a floor covered in dust, all of the furniture piled in the corner, and no grout between all of the tiles. Oh, and 2 freshly cracked tiles. Apparently the job was too big to handle in one day so hopefully everything will be fixed tomorrow. But it's Taiwan so I'm not holding my breath. That's all I've got for now!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Do you want to eat or hit the street? Eat!

This last weekend, I visited Brisbane to celebrate the ol' one year anniversary with Kelly. It was a blast, although it went by way too fast and now feels like it never happened. We ate a lot of great food, saw Avatar in 3D (awesome!), went to the Gallery of Modern Art, went on a run and got a sunburn (my first in months), and had the privelege of meeting all of the great people she has in her life down there. Australia was definitely looking pretty nice, especially considering that it's been consistently cold, gray, and rainy for the last few weeks here. Central heating does not exist in this country, so when it's 40 degrees outside, it's the same inside. It's supposed to get into the 30s this weekend so I'm looking forward to that, let me tell you. And yes, it's a damp cold. No other big news other than that. I'm putting up some pictures on flick so check those out. I've been a little behind!